Incandescence
by Resplendnce
Summary: She held her own gravity, like a planet: Like a moon. These emblems on our chests only weighed us down. I fell victim to the ways of the heart and from within the hazy film saw clearly for the first time Shinra Corp and all her essence. Zack/Lightning
1. Local God

_-All characters, all previous plot lines, all unoriginality herein does not belong to me-_

_Please enjoy the story and don't forget to review! ^_^_

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><p>I'm Zack Fair. SOLDIER 1st Class. I live in a small apartment complex near the southern side of Sector 5 with my dog, Taki. I have an X shaped scar on my left cheek, bear a slight weakness for beautiful women, motorcycles and high risk combat situations, and I haven't spoken to my parents in years.<p>

But all this information pales to the fact that right now, I have a seriously distracting wedgie crawling it's way up my ass.

"What the _hell_ are you doing, Fair!"

Standing spread eagle on the back of this rabid Zu, I'm having a difficult time finding the proper balance with three inches of cloth shoved between my butt cheeks. With my sword stuck into the right shoulder blade of the poor flying creature, my only option is to use it for balance while I try to fix myself right again. This would be fine if it wasn't messing up my battle plan and making me look like a complete moron in front of the one and only-

"Lightning, ergh... hold on a sec I just gotta-"

The beast jerks, knocking me further off balance and causing my blade to come loose and fall heavy on the ground, with myself still clutching the hilt. I look up at the sky and thank the forces of gravity for always being there for me, again and again and again.

"Oh for fuck's sake, Fair!"

Then there's Lightning, fellow 1st Class SOLDIER and leader of the current Serial mission, leaning over me with a scowl. I half expect her to tell me she was right in wanting to go solo two hours ago; when we rode out to our assigned locations, equipped and ready to take on the world. That was the first time I ever saw her face to face. The first time I ever saw her scowl, disappointed, or stare me down with those cold blue eyes. It only takes one glare from those eyes- one jaw clench in my direction- to remind me that I'm being judged every second of the way.

"There was something...you know, wedgie." I say awkwardly, pushing myself out of the sand. "Sorry, had to get it out"

"Next time it'll be my boot up your ass. _Get. Up_."

Her sword spring loaded from its hold as she charged, launching herself into the air with female agility. Her knee came down just below the wound I'd inflicted in its' shoulder and as she reached around, bringing her blade across its' throat, the thick skin tore open and stained the sand with blood. With drowned, gurgling cry the Zu fell beneath her, dead, and Lightning, standing tall and unwavering, dismounted from it's back like some sort of gold metal gymnast.

"Impressive." I said with a smirk. She ignored me and proceeded toward the poor creature's caracass.

"Here." she said, forcing the loot bag into my hand. She reached into her belt, pulling out a large, expensive looking hunting knife and slicing from the corpse a thick slab of skin along the right thigh.

"Serial number?" I said, moving next to her to read the faded scar.

"No. 61104." She said with a sigh.

"At least the mission is a success."

"Don't be stupid. We still have three more to go."

"Right..." Lightning wiped her blade clean and holstered it, turning to me with those intensly determined eyes.

"Let's move on."

"Hey! Uh.. about that.." I said to her back, running to catch up with her. "Sorry, I mean. The next one's all me." She stopped walking to spit at the ground with her hand on one hip. I smiled, scratching my neck and hoping she could overlook my lack of valor. I saw her give me a sideways glance before continuing our walk through the desert.

"Just don't let your panties get in a wad this time."

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><p>Snow's energetic laughter and exaggerated arm flailing had pie flying off his fork and all over the table. I was trying to shield my hamburger from the wreckage, knowing all too well that tomatoes don't go so well with blackberries. The other guys at our table were listening intimately to Snow's story; their eyes fixed and mouths half open in a wide grin. I wasn't listening because I'd heard this story four times already and instead contemplated throwing sesame seeds into Kunsel's gaping mouth.<p>

"-and then she decks the old man, square between the eyes and says '_Tha's for knowin' the differ'nce!_'"

At this the table of men roars with laughter, banging their fists on the stainless steel. I take another bite of my burger and smile.

"Zack!" Snow says with a punch to my arm. "Wha's the matter? First class not allowed to join in anythin' fun?" I shake my head with a grin and push him back with my finger on his forehead.

"No, dip shit, I've just heard that story four times."

"Touche."

"So I heard you went on another Serial mission." Kunsel said across the table. "What's that? Like the fifth one this week?"

"Yeah. The fiends just keep poppin' up all over the place."

"Word on the street is the Turks are investigating it. High priority. Top secret stuff."

"Oh yeah, well if it's so '_Top secret_' then how the hell does a grunt like you know about it?" That was Snow, shoveling another mouthful of pie into his stomach. Kunsel puffed up defensively.

"I also heard Zack was paired with a certain... _lady_?" This got Snow's attention immediately while Kunsel leaned back in his chair, smiling sheepishly. Snow's entire body went from relaxed to animated in less than two seconds and I wanted to just drag him into a sound proof room before any further damage could be initiated. I decided, instead, to burrow my face behind my burger.

"Who was it Kunsel!" Snow shouted, now standing.

"Well, you know, I shouldn't really-" I cut him off with a glare, shutting him down almost instantly.

"Just drop it, dude."

"Hey.. Kunsel? Buddy? Remember that time we went to Katz's and you hand three too many Tiltzers? Hmmm?" Snow was leaning over the table, looking the poor guy straight in the eye. A flash of sudden knowledge sparked in his eyes before he blurted out-

"H-he was paired with Lightning!"

Wow, that was easy enough.

"_Zaaaack!_" Snow cried out like a little kid. " How could you fail to mention this man!" He was waving his arms around like a flightless bird and talking way too loud to be in the cooperate cafeteria. "Lightning! Hellooo? SOLDIER, 1st Class. No prisoners? No survivors?"

I wonder what happened between those two that night at Katz's..

Snow rambles on and on about all her amazing achievements and what and honor it was to work with her and blah blah.

I just took another bite of my burger.

Lightning isn't her real name, at least, I don't think it is. I'd never met anyone who knew her as anything else, or anyone who knew anyone who did. She made 1st Class immediately upon entering SOLDIER and is currently tops in every training exercise - even helped designed many of the advanced courses herself. Her gunblade is made of some grade S material beyond man-made capabilities and Shinra scientists are still working on solving that riddle for themselves. She has a small bit of family, somewhere, but no one knows who or where they are.

Honestly, most of this information is old news by now. She's been part of Shinra for over a year and nothing Snow has to say to me holds any interest anymore. But he still goes on and on, occasionally backed up by Kunsel's large web of knowledge, and I just finish off my burger. The other guys around the table, however, are listening intently to their ring leader in question. And if it's one thing Snow thrives on, it's an intently alert audience.

"Not _only_ that but she's been the only SOLDIER since Genesis with the same potential fighting calibur as Sephiroth himself! "

"Yes Snow.. I know.."

"Ugh! Zaaack! How can you not care about this! _And worse!_ Why am I just hearing about this now?" His whining cues everyone to shut up and focus on me. I look up at them with a shrug.

"Well.. honestly I don't think I made a good impression." My head lowered almost onto the table, just knowing I shouldn't look around the cafeteria for any listeners at this point. "I mean I had a momentary problem with my boxers getting stuck in my ass."

And the table exploded with fist pounding laughter all over again.

Then a new voice cuts across the noise.

"Hey Zack! We're going out for drinks tonight! You comin'?" Cloud, a nice guy and a good friend, walking across the room and coming to my rescue.

Snow opened his mouth wide, obviously about to invite himself along but was cut short by the random shoe flying straight into the back of his head. Immediately behind it came an angry blonde in a well tailored, black suit.

"_Villiers!_ You got _pie_ in my _hair_!"

Then 2nd Class SOLDIER, Snow Villiers, bounded over the table and out through the kitchen's emergency exit as Elena Houston, the well dressed, self proclaimed princess of the Turks, ran after him in close pursuit.

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><p>Katzroy's is hoppin' tonight. The air is thick with smoke and heavy with excitement. The rumbling sounds of good music, pool balls, and slamming shot glasses makes the entire room seem to sway with good, clean,inebriated cheer.<p>

Snow slides down from the bar stool beside me with heavy eyes and a slight stagger in his step. I lift the last of my bourbon to my lips and nod at him as he sidles away and across the room to the jukebox where a cute red head is contemplating what to play next.

"You seem too sober to me, soldier." Reno says, sitting down next to me and ordering a 20oz mug of Blue Moon, like he always does. I held my glass of ice up in cheers and he clicked his tongue at me.

"Hey, get another for this man." He said motioning the bartender over with a friendly wave. The young, dark skinned man gives a nod and slides me a new glass.

"Thanks." I said, smiling and sipping some of it for Reno's benefit.

"Don't mention it." Laughter came from across the room and I turned absently to see Snow dancing with the red head, just like a drunk.

"We're close to figuring it out." Reno said with a hushed sigh. "The Serial Fiends that is. Tsung's still in the field."

Reno wasn't one to talk about work when he came to Katz's and I was taken off guard when he mentioned this now.

"Isn't that supposed to be top secret stuff?"

"Well, you know." He said with a smirk.

For about 20 minutes we sat together in silence before he finally spoke up again.

"They're getting a lot stronger." He scratched his neck with a scowl. "These hybrids..."

"I know."

"Who's to say where the next one will hit, eh?"

I noticed the bourbon start to hit me when Reno's hair became incredibly vibrant underneath the bar lighting. I lifted my head up and looked around the room one good time, feeling the weight of my skull tilting my vision. Snow wasn't dancing anymore, in fact I couldn't see him anywhere. I wasn't worried though, knowing he was probably upstairs kissing on some unlucky girl. I turned back to my friend and saw not red but pink strands of long curly hair. This made me jump a little, almost like when you feel a bug on your arm and you think it's gonna be something small like an ant but when you look down at it it's almost as big as your hand.

"Lightning!" I shouted, becoming off balance on my small stool. I reached for the counter to hold myself upright and managed to mumble something along the lines of not being afraid of bugs. Her eyebrows raised up slightly, but for the most part ignoring me completely. She orders a Cosmopolitan from the bartender, sips it twice, then turns to me with a small grin.

"What's wrong, Fair? Something stuck up your ass?"

And from the rooms above, I heard Snow laughing like a sick monkey.

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><p>The dramatic situations you find yourself in throughout your every day life tend to vary based on the choices you make. The moment I signed my name on that dotted line, giving myself into the Shinra Corp, I automatically gained about twelve hundred different possible scenarios all troublesome. All dangerous. Don't get me wrong, I love being in SOLDIER.<p>

Everything about it gets my blood pumping.

So ten minutes after waking up on the floor of my apartment, half past noon, I got a call from the director asking me to come in for an assignment. Snow and I made it back to headquarters in little over half an hour and the bullet train ride into the city was just long enough for us to change into our official uniforms.

"Never been on a mission like this before." Snow said, pulling his gloves on and cracking his knuckles.

"It's nothing too special." I say, watching out the window at the dark tunnel lights. "As SOLDIER we're ordered to do a lot of dirty work. Luckily this time it's apprehension only."

"No search and destroy?" Snow said with a laugh. The corners of his eyes wrinkled with excitement. I shook my head with a smile and pulled my belt tight.

"People aren't fiends, Snow, no matter what Shinra tells you."

The building was quiet for the most part. A few friendly receptionists graced our presence with a smile. A lonesome janitor scrubbed the displays. Snow pushed the button for the elevator, winking at one of the girls. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed her hide her face in what I assumed was a blush. I started to wonder if Snow only flirted to boost the egos of the women around him. Then I figured he was really just that horny all the time.

"Will we be going in together?" Snow asked, following me into the elevator.

"Probably." I said with a nod. He let out a heavy sigh, clearly showing some much needed relief.

"You know.. I've never been on a first class mission before either."

"Don't be nervous, man. I'm 'll be fine."

"Yeah." He smiled and clamped his hand behind my neck. "Yeah, thanks."

We rode the elevator the rest of the way in silence. Snow was clearly tense, not unlike Cloud during the more important operations. When the machine stopped and the door slid open to let us out I heard him mumble quietly to himself

'Let's do this.'

Inside the mission briefing we were told the basic data we needed using automated voice instruction and high quality monitors. She wished us good luck in our apprehension and the computers shut themselves down without delay.

"You know something?" He said as we reached the underground parking garage. "I've decided to call her Lady."

"Who? The computer woman?" I straddled my Hardy-Daytona as per usual.

"Well, you know, think about it. She's always giving us orders and answering our calls but no one really calls her anything. Kind of sad."

"Huh.." I laugh with a shrug. "Guess I never noticed."

So here's Snow, 2nd Class SOLDIER and my best friend. My best friend, who's so nervous about his first 1st Class mission that he's talking about naming computer voices and rubbing his hands on his pants to wipe the sweat from his palms. I clamp my hand down on the back of his neck and start my bike up without any more stalling.

"Think you can keep up, SOLIDER?"

And as the large steel doors rolled open, we broke out into the night air like bats out of hell.

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><p><em>To be continued in the next chapter..<em>


	2. The Precipice

_Hey guys! I'm back with another chapter of this crackship fanfic.  
><em>

_Thanks so much for reading and don't forget to review! _

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My heart was barely beating. Slowed, like the subtle death of a drained animal. My hands were steady on the hilt and I was practically in sync with the movement of the crowd. Snow was positioned at the only probable exit and I could feel his movements as well as my own. The visions beneath the darkness hummed around my senses. The sounds platonic and burning with emotion as the mass body heat of the crowd lifted up into the air and lingered like a fog.

There's a dimly lit stage nearly fifty yards away from my fingertips housing a group I'd never heard before. Their clothes are torn and grey: jeans, tanks and old shoes. Their hair an assortment of styles all ranging from shaved to incredibly long and all dripping with sweat. Guitars, bass, drums, symbols, screaming keyboards,and a massive symphonic organ: all these play together loudly as the female singer cries angrily into the microphone. She's speaking a different language and she's crying real tears.

I wonder what they're singing about that has the crowd so animated. I wonder if the crowd even knows what she's singing about.

The only person I should be concerned with, however, is our target. His name is Rotsu Yuu and he is being charged with several accounts of known terrorism including fiend breeding and experimentation. Tonight, in this crowded warehouse filled with sweating, raving college students, he is expecting a package. A package that could alter the fiends genetics so drastically that hunting them will become more of a problem than ever before. Even for 1st class SOLDIER.

Every time he moves, he moves a few paces northeast.  
>Every time he moves a few paces northeast, he becomes tense.<br>I glance over at Snow who isn't used to a mission like this.

He's becoming impatient.

Our man makes eye contact with someone across the room. He scratches his ear, some kind of signal or just nervous itching I can't be sure. I'm never more than five people away from him and I'm certain he feels our presence if only because of paranoia. He's too nervous. He's too scared.

I feel Snow's impatience and try to signal him to be still. I look back. The man has vanished. The music picks up rhythm. The sad song is over and the sea of bodies moves quickly to the beat. My heart ceases up and I close my eyes for a split second, picking Rotsu's fear and awkward breathing out of the tightly knit group.

I found him. But when I opened my eyes I saw not only Rotsu but Snow as well, just a few feet away on the south side and closing in on him very fast.

Snow's inexperience and impatience was throwing not only our careers but our lives in the balance. As I run after him my gut tightened painfully as though a hand was squeezing my organs with unrelenting force. White spots gathered before my eyes and I pushed beyond this strange pain with only one thought: we could not fail this mission.

Rotsu notices the SOLDIER in pursuit, and somehow manages to dodge a grasping fist not once but twice. I catch up to my partner, my fist colliding with the back of his head as I run by him He curses in my direction as I order him to circle around and catch him at the exit. This was our original plan to begin with.

My phone rings.  
>I ignore it.<p>

Rotsu has somehow managed to disappear within the crowd again. I stop running and breathe. Closing my eyes, forcing the nervous nausea away and listening for the irregular scraping of running boots on the warehouse floor. Even with my SOLDIER enhancements the concert is making it incredibly hard to focus on anything. I hear Snow's inhale and exhale. He's steady and fit and adjusted. I listen closer and hear a shuddering pant, scared and hasty. But just when I pinpoint the location a lung crushing scream echos throughout the warehouse and the music stops instantly leaving only the fading echo of the organ.

The singer has collapsed on the stage, blood gushing from her mouth and all down her grimy white tank-top in a violent display. Her band mates rush to help her and as they reach her she pulls a small knife from her side with shaking hands. Somewhere offstage, fans are brutally beating a man within an inch of his life and are soon joined by the singer's group. Amongst the chaos of the unexpected murder before us, Rostu Yuu escaped me completely.

So I ran. Out of the warehouse and into the dark, rainy streets of Midgar with Snow somewhere close behind me. He's shaken up. He's angry with himself. I close my eyes and listen to the sounds again.

And there, just above us on the roof, there's a quiet shuffling of feet and the subtle click of phone keys. I motion to Snow signaling him to make a wide circle around the warehouse. I start my silent ascend along the frail fire escape and land on the ledge right behind our target. Rotsu sees me and grips his phone tightly, backing away from me with a scowl. As planned, Snow is soon on the other ledge and when the man moves backward he lands himself directly into Snow's grasp.

At this he lets out a growl, his fist coming around and just missing Snow's jaw. Snow smiles at him with a wink and catches his fist in his palm, twisting Rotsu's arm painfully behind his back.

"_Hey there_." Snow mumbles in his ear. I drop down in front of them as he's searching him for concealed weaponry and tying his wrists into binds.

"I have to give you credit Yuu-san. You're a fast runner." Snow says, stopping to think. "You don't mind if I call you Yuu-san, do you?"

"_Fuck you_."

"I mean after all we're already in a holding hands relationship." Snow looks up at me and shows a toothy grin. I shake my head at him. Now is definitely not the time for his cheeky antics.

"Rotsu Yuu, you have been found guilty in the assisting of planned, deliberate fiend experimentation. These fiends have not only killed many innocent civilians but caused the Shinra Corp. much grief in the charge of eliminating them." He stares up at me with piercing, unrelenting eyes and spits at my feet.

"You SOLDIER scum? You're nothing." When he speaks, his voice is strangely foreign. I can't, however, place the origin. "You don't know. You don't understand. You're just souped up thugs built to kill anything Shinra deems nuisance."

"I resent that." I say, staring him down. "I'm not a proud killer."

"But this one here.." Rotsu says, indicating Snow. "..is just a pup in a pack of dogs. I can smell it on his skin."

Snow is keeping him tightly restrained and at this he drives his thumb into his back, discomforting Rotsu even more. He retorts angrily, his emotions quickly getting the better of him.

"Shut up."

"I can even smell the _desire_ to kill. It's so.. _pungent_." He sniffs the air in a theatrical display. "Like the mound between a woman's legs."

"SHUT UP!"

Snow twirls him around to face him and brings his fist across his face. I jump toward them, separating them before he can strike again. Rotsu falls to the ground, laughing, his lip bleeding all over his shirt. Snow rushes to kick him, stomp him, bring more pain to this terrorist that we are only to secure.

"Snow!" I cry, reaching for his arm and pulling him back. Rotsu is still laughing loudly.

"You see? If not for this boy you would have caught me long before that poor woman had to die."

"Your man is dead too, Rotsu." I say, taking my phone from my thigh pocket.

"Sacrifices must be made."

"Zack.. let me _hurt_ him."

I look up over the glowing screen and give Snow a glare to be quiet. Rotsu continues to run his mouth, trying to shake us up. I ignore him, deleting the flashing missed call notification and quickly dialing the automated mission system to confirm our captive. Lady coos into my ear. Snow is biting his tongue.

"**~I'm sorry, but I am not authorized to confirm this mission successful.**"

"**~One moment while I connect you to the highest authority of the current operation."**

Rotsu is on his knees, his hands bound and Snow standing behind him, his fist holding him by his hair.

"What rank are you _SOLDIER boy_?" he spits cruelly. Snow ignores him. "Oh come on. I'll be dead in 48 hours the least you can do is talk to me."

The phone is picks up.

**"Has Rotsu Yuu been secured?"**

"Yes, sir. Do we have permission to return to headquarters? We'll need transport."

There's a silence on the other end. Rotsu is still talking.

"It really is a shame about that girl. She was quite pretty."

"Will you _shut up_!" Snow pulls his hair and jerks his head back to look at his sneering face. "I hope they slit your throat."

"Oh I do too!" He laughs.

**"The order has changed. Dispose of him."**

"Sir?"

**"I hope this is not a problem?"**

"No, sir."

**"I'll expect your full report tomorrow morning."**

"Yes, sir."

The phone disconnects and all I'm left with is another operator telling me to hang up and dial again.

"Yes, _sir_! Anything _sir_! Can I please, oh please suck your cock _sir_?"

"CAN IT!_"_

An execution? Without even a warning? Why would our mission be to only apprehend him and then so suddenly change in context? And why me? Why not someone else?

"Snow.." I said, a dull feeling beginning in the pit of my stomach. "Pick him up."

He pulls him once more by the hair and Rotsu scrambles to his feet, still chuckling at his joke. I walk over to them, grab the binds around his hands and look to my friend with a stern gaze.

"Your mission is over. I've confirmed it with headquarters. You can go."

"Zack?"

"I'm sorry Snow, but as your superior I am ordering you to leave."

"Ooh, are you going to take that from him?"

"Don't you pull that superior shit on me!"

"As your friend I'm asking." His eyes were nearly lost in his glare but no matter how twisted this moment seemed, he did as he was told and headed for the fire escape.

"Yeah...yeah alright."

I stood there in silence thinking of what to do next. I heard Snow's bike start up and I watched from the roof as he sped off toward the center of town. He was angry and would probably end up at Katzroy's Bar before dawn. Rotsu started to laugh again.

"What now, pretty boy? Is this the part when you cut off my head? Beat me so badly that no one will recognize the body? Do tell."

"I'm not ordered to interrogate you." Rotsu's laughter faded from his eyes and he turned his head from me to look out over the edge.

"How fair of a fight is this, then? I'm all tied up."

"You're right." I say, pulling a small knife from my boot and cutting his binds. He stands there for a moment playing with the plastic ties still around his wrists before he turns to face me with evil eyes.

"Well now, isn't this a turn of events." He grins, adjusting his stance.

"They want me to execute you Rotsu. Right here. In cold blood." I glare into his deep black eyes. "But I _won't_ kill a defenseless man." He throws his head back, laughing.

"You're too kind."

At this he advances, clearly skilled in hand to hand combat. The palm of his hand comes up, brushing by the bone beneath my left eye. I dodge, turn, dodge again: dancing this dance with an opponent as skilled as a SOLDIER. It's impressive.

Our feet shuffle about the roof. The wind picks up. The night grows colder. Below us people are filing out of the warehouse, escorted by Shinra infantry while the bodies of the young singer and Rotsu's ally are being lifted into an ambulance. No one notices us.

Finally he lunges his full frame at me in one desperate attempt to do some damage. I kick him in the chest and knock him onto his back. When he stands, he wipes his mouth and grins at me one last time with those evil looking eyes. I watch him jump onto the ledge and raise his arms up above him, laughing.

"You know something, SOLDIER boy? Killing me doesn't _solve_ anything."

"Killing you will stop those mutated fiends and save innocent lives. That's all I'm after."

"But it doesn't! My mission today has been a success! And yours a failure. How does that feel?" I stop for a moment, looking into his eyes for some bit of truth.

"My mission.. is to kill you."

"But why would Shinra want me dead? To save lives? Come on pretty boy you know as well as I do that they don't care about life."

"So, what then? Why does Shinra want you dead?"

Rotsu wasn't a coward. He wasn't afraid to die. So when he leaned himself backward from that high ledge he knew what awaited him at the bottom. I rushed to stop him, getting hold of his ankle just as he dived off the building: Arms above his head, backward, his face stern and unwavering. He chuckled softly over the cold wind and shouted up to me.

"Why would you save me now?"

I didn't have an answer for him, really. I didn't like him. I didn't feel sorry for him. I had to carry out my mission. But what if I was wrong. What if killing him would only further endanger those at the mercy of his fiends? He said his mission was a success. He said killing him solved nothing.

I gripped his boot tightly and began pulling him up. But he was determined to go. He reached up and unlatched the buckle on his boot with one quick movement. His foot slid out, gravity took hold immediately, and he fell, head first, onto the pavement below.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	3. Local Authority

_And I'm back with another one! ^_^ It's so much fun re-writing this fan-fiction. I hope things are becoming a bit clear-er at least_  
><em> (and that the grammar has improved since last time.) <em>_  
><em>

_Please review!_

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"..so it need not be stated again, but Rotsu Yuu is dead, sir." I say, finishing my report for the Director in standing salute.

"You did well, SOLDIER." He said, standing and shaking my hand. "But I would expect no less from a member of 1st class."

"Thank you, sir." I say, holding my salute. He adjusts his tie, smooths his shirt down before sitting back behind his desk with a pondering expression.

"But I'm impressed that you chose such a violent display of elimination. Making it look like suicide is work I would expect from Genesis or Sephiroth. Not you.."

"Sir.. I-"

"All I can say is well done. The less Shinra seems involved in all this murder the better."

I bit my tongue, weighing the option of telling him what really happened. How would he react to know I let him go? I allowed him to fight. I even fought to save him in those last few moments, knowing well my orders were to kill.

I decided it was best just to keep quiet.

"Thank you again, sir." I broke salute and turned from him, walking toward the door as slowly as I could manage.

"You may take the day for some easy training." He called to me as I had just reached the handle. I stopped for a moment, turning to look at him one more time before closing the heavy door behind me.

Easy training. Just a trip to the facilities downstairs and yet for some reason I couldn't shake the feeling I was missing something. A large weight that was already resting on my shoulders now seemed even more urgent and unwavering. What was it? What was wrong?

I decided it was best to skip the training.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

I drove.

I drove and drove until I was well beyond Midgar. Well beyond the slums, the smog, the rusting iron walls and crowded streets. I drove on through the marshes of Kalm and the green fields beyond the Chocobo Ranch. I drove up the mountain pass and above the Mythril Mines. I reached Junon. I kept going. Boarded a ferry and drove across the land until I was nearly out of gas. I refilled at Rocket Town. I pressed on toward Wutai.

The sun came up the next day, just like always, and I was still riding the roads like a ghost.

I couldn't get that night out of my mind. I saw the strobe lights every time I blinked. The bleeding, dying singer in all her brave glory. The rioting fans beating that poor man to death. The music hanging over me like a disease, grabbing my insides and pulling me along. I could still smell the sweating inebriated crowd. I could still taste the cold air up on that roof.

I saw Rotsu's determined, evil eyes and bleeding lip. His expression mocking and wild and how his teeth showed sharply with every wicked, bloody grin and snide comment. Then I saw him fall. Again and again and again he fell right before my eyes. His body lay broken. His head concave, smashed into the pavement. The blood spilled everywhere. The bits of brain and skull littering the street around him.

My bike roared gently beneath me. The dirt and rock made the most relaxing sound against the tires. I rolled my eyes beneath my lids one good time, releasing the images from my head with difficulty.

I found myself on the highest peak, looking out at everything there was to be seen. I cleared my mind of everything I had experienced the night before. I watched the waves collide with the side of the mountain, eroding it. Changing it. In that moment I thought of Snow. I remembered the confusion and anger in my best friend's eyes. I thought about calling him.

No service.

Suddenly I heard a loud groan from somewhere in the forest below me and the echo of steel on thick hide. There was no denying it was female.

I rode into the very heart of trouble.

Lightning was kneeling on the ground, her gunblade laying at her side like an abandoned toy. Three large Rapps were circling around her. Their hide was an off red color and their eyes seemed clouded over, almost as if they were blind. I drew my sword from the sheath on my back and dived into the fray without thinking. Instead of scattering as Rapps often do when attacked in groups, they circled together and dived straight for my head all at once. I used my weapon as a shield and knocked them back simultaneously in one blow. One hit the rock facing and lay momentarily still in the dirt. The other two came back for more, snapping and biting at my arms without pause. One of their wings caught my ear, cutting the skin through and through. I dodged, turned to Lightning and shielded her from the others advance as it came.

"They're blind, Fair! Get behind them!" She shouted at me from above their shrill cries. I did as I was told and launched myself from the ground, into the air and steadily behind the raging group. They broke formation to find my scent again and as they flapped around blindly in the air I reached for the nearest one's tail and slung it into the mountain. The impact struck it hard and allowed me to kill it in one stab to the heart.

Lightning was standing again but her right arm was hanging strangely at her side and her legs were badly cut up and bleeding. She called forth an electric charge and jumped high into the air before landing on the bigger one's back. She then drove the electricity up its' spine, bringing it down instantly with nothing more than an after-death muscle contraction.

With only one left I was now at the advantage I needed. The poor, blind creature was lost without his comrades and couldn't tell which scent was more threatening. It decided on Lightning as its' target and beat its' wings wide before honing in on her exhausted frame. She called a static shield around herself and I opened my mouth, screaming at it.

"Hey ugly!"

The Rapps turned its head to the side and became immediately distracted by my voice to tend to Light anymore. This relieved me greatly, allowing me enough confidence to take it out without anymore delay.

It opened its beak wide and cried an ear splitting, sound breaking cry that knocked us both off balance and kept me on the ground. My legs were literally immobilized and my insides began to twist and writhe within me, making me nauseous. I watched as it hovered closer to me, even saw its giant talons lingering directly over my neck and chest; on its' belly I saw the raised scar of a serial number, fresh and pink. I willed my limbs to move on their own again but only managed to lift my weapon above my head.

Then from behind it thrust a familiar sword through its' stomach and it's thick, scorching blood poured onto my face and clothes. As it fell, it fell onto my own blade, ironically: finally silent.

"What are you doing here, Zack?" Lightning said a bit coldly. My limbs now worked on their own despite the killer headache I was feeling erupt in my skull. She walked closer to the shadows of the forest and leaned against the trees with some weight. She slid down the bark and grit her teeth in pain.

"Did they do that to you?" I said indicating her legs and arm. She nodded and gave me a small grin, laughing at herself.

"I should have been able to handle them on my own, right?"

"They were Serial's.." I said, nodding at the nearest corpse. "You can see the scar on that one's belly, easily. It's fresh too."

"I knew they were Serial's." She said, nestling closer to the tree. "I knew that.." She whimpered a little when her shoulder accidentally touched the bark behind her.

"It's dislocated. Let me fix it."

"No, Zack." But I already had hold of her arm.

"I remember what they taught us in basic Med training when I first joined the Shinra infantry." I said, making her lay back in my lap and keeping her arm in it's resting position. She closed her eyes tightly, angry with me or with herself or maybe both. I had to keep her talking.

"Why were you out here alone?"

"Training."

"You push yourself too hard, Light." I began to bend her arm at a ninety degree angle and turned her arm and shoulder toward her chest. "Three Serials against one is too much."

"The fuck do you know? I'm not a child_._" She snapped, gritting her teeth in pain and anger. I rotated her arm and shoulder outward, keeping her upper arm stationary. "You can't just show up, play hero and then tell me what to d-AHH!"

Her shoulder popped back into its' joint and I saw the relief wash over her face instantly.

She sat up, moving it around a little then immediately reached for her gunblade, which was still in the Rapps's back. I crossed my legs, Indian style, wiped some of the fiend's blood off my face and neck, then put my chin in my hands as I watched her clean it angrily.

"You need a sling." I called to her from the trees. She turned to me sharply and brandished her blade in my face.

"Thank you for all your help today." she said from behind it. "I appreciate it. My arm is great now. You can go."

"I don't think that I will." I said, smiling up at her from the ground. She tackled me instantly and held me down with the blunt side of her sword against my throat. Our noses were close to touching and I could feel the heat off her breath with each word she mumbled.

"Like I said. Zack Fair, _you can go now_."

"Not if you're on top of me, I can't."

She growled and moved off of me. I didn't get up though.

"You know, you're lucky the healing hadn't started yet." I nodded. "Cause you'd have had a bitch of a time trying to fix that one."

"I already said thank you."

"That's not what I'm after, Light."

"What more do you want?"

"Aren't you going to tell me what you were doing?"

"I was training."

"Recklessly. Carelessly. And you know, it takes a lot more than that to dislocate a shoulder. _Especially_ if you're in SOLDIER."

"You're right. I was careless in a combat situation."

"That your mentor talking or you?"

"I'll do **better** next time."

"Next time bring someone else with you. Call me, if you have to."

"I look forward to our next exciting confrontation."

But before I could really think of anything witty or clever to say she snapped her fingers together and launched herself beyond my following.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Sometime after dawn I made it back to my apartment.

Taki ran to greet me as she often did and was eager to jump and play, yipping her cute puppy sounds and wagging her tail. I sat on the kitchen floor, exhausted, and let her curl up in my lap and lick my hand.

"Hey girl." I said, burying my face in her soft fur. "Did you miss me?" She was still eagerly wagging her tail. Those light blue eyes seemed to just glow under her black and grey coat. I couldn't even imagine what she'd be like when she was fully grown.

I took my phone from my pocket and filtered through a few missed calls. Cloud's name appeared around 1:38 am last night; sometime when Rotsu was attempting to escape capture. Snow also called me twice just this morning.

I deleted the logs and pushed myself off the tile to refill Taki's food bowl. She seemed happy about this and danced around the kitchen at my feet, finally sitting down and watching me move with studying eyes. I just laughed at her and rolled her over to rub her belly.

"You keep eating all of it in one night and your tummy will blow up! Like a balloon!"

She just yipped in response.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

That night I had a dream.

Two gunblades crossing another in battle, their wielders very skilled and very shadowed from clear view. The crossing stops, the blades lay in a deep mud, the wielders gone.

I'm walking to my bike in the underground garage. The boys are standing under a hanging light, talking, backs turned to me. My phone rings out shrilly in the darkness, making me jump. Their heads turn sharply. When I reach out for them the image in front of me changes.

There's a blanketed mass on my bed, stirring slightly and smelling sweet. I remove the heavy quilt slowly and find a beautiful woman, naked, sleeping. I glance at her face, but not at all stunned to see that pale skin or those light pink curls. What I am stunned to see is a smile on the lips of this sleeping Lightning. It makes me pause.

When she opens her eyes, she draws me to her, and I've just grazed her lips when-

I wake up.  
>Erect.<br>My phone ringing.

"Uhhh..um.. yeah-lo?"

"Are you awake?"

It was kind of like when you're walking on the beach in your bare feet, feeling the warm sand flow in between your toes, listening to the birds and the waves and the laughing of kids somewhere behind you. Then you step on a really sharp shell.

Imagine that vividly in your head.

Now, that's sort of what it's like when you have a steamy dream about a girl, an especially intriguing girl with looks and muscle and brains, knowing damn well your chances with her are non-existent in this plane of reality.

Then she calls you as soon as you open your eyes.  
>Especially when it's Lightning.<p>

"A-a- uhmm.. Am..am I awake?" I stammered, trying to shove the sea-shell shock out of the way and making it sound like more of a question directed at myself than at her.

"You sound coherent to me. We have a mission today so get up. I'd like to finish before your bedtime."

"Right! I'm in the process of sitting up right now."

"In the.. process?"

"..Yes."

There's a brief silence between us. I clear my throat and add-

"I just woke up."

There's another brief silence. Then suddenly, she laughs.

"Fix yourself. I'll be there in fifteen minutes."

"At _my_.. _place_?"

She hangs up.

_Oh my God._

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	4. We Rise

_Hey guys! This time around, the chapter is a bit shorter than you're used to. _  
><em>No worries though! There's more to come soon enough. I hope this can tide you over until then? ^_^;<em>

_Don't forget to review! (Please, please, please?)_

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

By the time I was out of the shower, Lightning was already standing in my living room. She was holding Taki suspended in mid air, arms length, so that they were eye level, and the pup was just wagging her tail while trying to close the gap between their faces with her nose. I stood there, smiling. The confused expression on Lightning's face, coupled with how eager Taki was to lick her, made a funny scene.

"You know you're in a towel, right?" Light said without even looking at me. I glanced down; my first instinct was to run in the opposite direction but I shrugged instead.

"It's not like you've never seen a shirtless man before." Taki yipped. Light's attention returned to the pup.

"This thing attacked me on my way in." She said, coldly. "Why do you have it?"

"Taki?" I said with a laugh. The dog turned her cute, husky head at the sound of her name. "She's my baby!"

I walked over to them and took her from Light's grasp, cradling her against my chest with one arm. She raised her front paws, playing with my Shinra tags like a cat and wagging her tail. Light sighed and turned her head with a slight blush.

"Just get dressed."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

We took a chopper from Shinra Corp, suited up our parachutes and waited until we were just near the forests of Gongaga. I didn't tease Lightning about Taki, like I wanted, or how well they seemed to be getting along by the time I had gotten dressed. I just kept the image of the two, laying in the floor and passing a ball back and forth, to myself.

Back on land we entered the trees and walked in silence for a while, listening for our mark. The forests hadn't changed since my last visit home. The scent of the wood and the contrasting greens and blues of the plant life. The sounds of wild fiends, not big enough to really harm anything, or the taste of the hanging dew. All of this was enough to clog your senses, make you forget what the outside air was like. These are things I always miss about home especially since leaving for Midgar.

Lightning sneezed.

My brief glance in her direction made her quicken her pace. She was something to watch, really, that layer of ice just thin enough to see through, but not to melt. Her sudden fast pace told me that she was embarrassed. She sneezed, and hey, that's human. But, because it's so human, she's embarrassed to have been caught doing it.

Just like when she hurt her shoulder.  
>Just like when she was playing with Taki.<p>

And that's the thing you need to understand about her, really. It's best to just leave her alone about it.

Her head jerked to the side; her stance sharpened as her fingertips brushed the hilt of her gunblade in an involuntary reaction. I sensed it too, a few seconds after she did and turned toward the sound and scent of our target, my eyes adjusting to the dim light of the forest.

We advanced into the trees, her speed and agility outweighing my own. Within seconds we arrived in a small clearing, surrounded by trees with three Grand Horns to the back. They were small. All huddled around each other like they were cold: an unusual behavior for these fiends.

"Aren't they a little bit.. small? Where's the mother?" But honestly I don't know why I bothered asking because when I turned to her she was already jumping high into the trees.

_Dammit you don't have to show off_.

She dropped from the branches and into the little group with ease, sending two of them flying. I was behind them, knocking the two she sent my way with the blunt end of my sword. They huddled together again, almost like nothing had happened, but she launched again and broke up the group, knocking them away.

"Don't let them group!" And again she broke apart their repaired formation.

Each time she pushed them back, they huddled together again. At first, I wasn't sure how to fight a group that wouldn't fight back but then I noticed something weird about these Grand Horns.

"They don't even have horns!"

Lightning smirked, shooting the ground at their feet, sending them scrambling again. Come to think of it, she wasn't actually hurting them at all.

A bullet rebounded toward my head and I reflected it with my sword. The group of baby Grand Horns were resilient. Lightning kept pushing.

"If they can't group up, they call for help."

"Got it!"

I charged using en elementary Blitz technique, keeping my stance in the middle of their path forcing them to pass by me on their way to the others. Light was trapezing on high branches directly over my head, firing burst shots at their feet. Finally, after what seemed like an hour of this daunting strategy, the siblings rooted themselves into the ground and let out a bone chilling shriek. Light's eyes flashed, her nostrils flared for a moment, and after a stunning silence, she tilted her head to the side and grinned.

"Hello, beautiful."

It came from beneath the earth. It broke out and tore down the surrounding trees. Lightning jumped down, landing behind me with a snort of a laugh. I adjusted my stance. She launched.

It's upper body was ill proportioned. Thick feet, thin legs, giant hands, thin arms and a torso bigger than all three of her children combined.

"She's big!" I laughed, bringing my blade across the backs of its legs while Lightning held its attention, straddling the shoulders.

The large mass that was its hand flew by my head in an attempt to swat me away, like some kind of mosquito. It missed and impacted with the side of Light's head. I heard her grunt and she was knocked off balance, flipping and rebounding from a trunk nearby. She crouched, wiping her mouth. I succeeded in removing that hand from its body.

The amount of blood was impressive and the way it flailed about, roaring and staining everything in a violet red, made me pity it. Light was already standing again, firing shot after shot into its temple. Its shell was thick and the bullets kept deflecting and flying in different directions, many toward me. My sword was quick to deflect them though while I slashed at its ankles, keeping it focused on me rather than Lightning.

One more by my head and the fiend goes down. Light's broken through its shell.

But it's not dead yet, just bleeding like a stuck pig. I rush it directly, dodging the other massive hand and shove my blade into the opening she'd cracked for me. It shrieked one last time, struggling against me until the movement slowed and finally stopped all together.

I pulled my sword from it, squinting at the amount of blood it'd shed. I wondered if Angeal was writhing in his grave, knowing how much use his precious sword was getting these days. Then I thought about Snow and how it was even possible that he did all of his combating by hand.

Lightning crouched down, holding her side and panting. She kept her head low and hiding her face from me.

"Surely that little exercise wasn't too much for you, SOLDIER?"

"I'm alright." She sounded breathless and kept her fist clenched on her side. "I just..need...a moment."

With those weak reassurances, she fell to one knee, coughing. A small amount of blood showered the ground, a brilliant red in contrast to the fiend's. I rushed to her side and caught her before she hit the ground, face first.

"_Move your hand._" I said sternly, cradling her head to my chest. She did as she was told, for once.

Wedged into her ribs, just below the heart, was a distinct bullet wound, severely large and deep enough to still hold the bullet itself. Her vest wasn't torn so it had obviously slipped in between the opening during the movement. Her chest was heaving while she breathed, her abs tense with each pulse. Every inch of her was stained heavily with blood, a mixture of fiend and SOLDIER.

"It must have ricocheted off.. something."

"Let's get back. We'll have a...**AHH**!" She hissed and her hands jumped to the wound. Muscle in her arms tightening, the skin around her neck stretching. I opened her side pouch, digging for something to dress it.

"That bullet is in the bone. It's deep. And your accelerated healing has already started to kick in which is why it hurts so much." She nodded, her eyes glimmering with tears. My hand found something slender and cold. I pulled it out and breathed relief at the beautiful survival knife. "If I don't get it out now there will be complications later. It will try to heal around the thing, and your movements will b-"

"Do it." She hissed. Her back was beginning to arch in pain. I didn't need telling twice.

I gave her my glove to bite down on. I lifted her into my lap, turning her on her side.  
>I plunged precisely, quickly finding the little scrap with the tip of the blade.<p>

Lightning let out one loud scream. Her fists were clutching at grass and dirt. The meat around the opening was burned from the impact since the bullets she was using were grade A SOLDIER and meant for heavy hitting.

It took time.  
>It took a quick wrist.<br>It took control.

I hooked the tip underneath the bullet, angling the knife carefully and trying not the rip open anymore flesh or stab a major organ.

Lightning was biting onto my leather glove. Her jaw bones were tense beneath her skin. Her moans were sealed off at the base of her throat.

It came out easily, much to my relief and fell onto the ground with a deafening thud.

I immediately grabbed a healing potion from her bag and poured the liquid onto the opening, washing it out. Lightning had her jaw clenched and remained deathly silent while I cleaned her up. She remained in my lap for a minute, her eyes closed as her Jenova cells took hold of the healing. A normal human would need it burned closed while it healed, immediate medical attention, weeks of recovery in some hospital bed. A normal human would be weeping and thrashing about in agony, screaming at the nearest nurse for painkillers.

I watched the wound begin to decrease in size almost as soon as I left it alone. The rate of recovery was astounding, much more advanced than mine. The meat was mending together again and the bone made a slight crackling sound as it healed as well.

"Thank you." She said, her voice unsteady and somewhat hoarse. I just shook my head and smiled down at her.

"You push yourself too hard." She scowled.

"Lucky me to always have Zack Fair to fix me up."

"Yeah, lucky you." I grinned.

She pushed herself out of my lap and stood up without any help. I watched her walk over to the dead fiend and carve the serial code from it's flesh using the same knife I had just used in her rib.

"Hey, Light!" I called, still sitting in the dirt. "We're partners, right?"

There was a silence as she turned to me, staring in confusion for a split second. After thinking on it for a second she nodded her head and showed me a small smile.

"I think you could call us friends now, Zack."

I leaned back with my hands behind my head and laughed.

"_Well then.. what about that_?"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	5. Entree

_Here's another chapter guys! Excitement? Yes._

_From here on out, things get heavy, fast._

_As always, review if you would please? I always take compliments, criticism, suggestions and corrections 100% to heart._  
><em>-hugs-<em>

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

_What.. is this?_

_It's so bright._

My head doesn't move when I will it to. My eyes stay fixed on the spot directly in front of me. I can't feel anything. I can't move anything. I'm not even sure what I'm looking at.

_Is it a wall?_

_A ceiling?_

All I know is, it's white.

Somewhere, just beyond earshot, a small group of men are talking in low voices. There's a shuffling of feet and paper. A door opens and closes. Air flow increases as a fan kicks on. I can feel the cold. I can feel the hairs on my body stand up; my nipples harden with the chill.

I'm suddenly aware of how naked I must be.

I also can't do anything about it. I can't even close my eyes.

Another door opens somewhere far to my left.

_"-uch will he remember?"_

_"More than likely his brai-"_

As it closes, the voices fade back into background noise.

There's someone beside me now, hovering dangerously close to my right. They carry a familiar scent and as they speak, a familiar voice. I beg myself to turn toward her but my body is unresponsive. I'm left to stare vacantly at the endless white directly above me.

She's whispering in my ear.

"I told you.."

I feel her hand brush along my thigh. My body doesn't react as it should.

"Didn't I?"

It moves up, along my hip.

"Didn't I?"

Palm spread, up my chest.

"Why don't you ever listen?"

Her fingers wrap around my throat.

_Lightning.._

Perfect nails press into my flesh.

The brightness above me increases and suddenly, my vision fades to reveal the darkest black I'll ever know.

And I wake up.

I'm on my couch, the TV is still on. Taki rises to greet me with a yawn, laying her head in my lap and nudging my hand with her nose. I pet her absently.

_What was that all about?_

"-and for a limited time only we'll give you a** SECOND** one for **FREE**! That's right! If you call right no-"

I grab the remote and turn off the infomercial guy and fall back onto the pillows with a grunt. Taki crawls up my chest, crunching herself up and licking my nose.

"Oh come on.." I say with a laugh. "It's too early.."

I can't even begin to think about that dream.

I got up, pouring some food into Taki's bowl before grabbing a Banora White from the fridge. She followed me happily, her paws tapping audibly on the hard wood floor. I took a bite of my apple, looking down at her sleepily as she nibbled on her food.

"Well, at least she wasn't naked this time.."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

That night, I parked my bike in the underground garage and sat quietly in the dim light.

In honesty, I wasn't even sure why I was here. Just checking in? My phone had been silent and I hadn't talked to the director since I left his office three days ago.

Still, I felt on edge. Something was wrong and all I needed was someone to point me toward it.

I dropped the kick stand and started toward the stairs, absently flipping through my phone. Still no messages.

The sound of scraping boots echoed in the open space and I looked up to see a familiar face coming down the stairs practically two at a time. It was Snow, ironically enough, and as soon as we make eye contact he threw his arms over his head in an enthusiastic wave.

"Zack!" I felt the guilt pour over me in that instant. I shouldn't have avoided him all week. There really wasn't a reason to. I guess I just didn't want someone to remind me of the Rotsu incident. I didn't want to be asked about it. I waved back at him with a smile, trying to just apologize with my eyes.

"What've you been up to, man?" I said, running toward him as he grabbed me up in a hug, slapping his hand on my back.

"Ahhh, you know, off being a hero! But what about you! I've been hearin' some rumors. Screw you for leaving me out of the loop man!"

He winked at me with a thumbs up grin.

"Snow, tell me these rumors do not involve myself and a particularly.. _dangerous_.. female friend.."

"Oh but they do!"

I sighed, grinning.

"None of it's true."

"But you haven't even hea-"

"If these rumors got to you by word of mouth, it's not true dude." He grinned again, throwing his arm around my neck and pulling me into him.

"Okay, we'll talk about that later. I have some seriously _killer_ news for you. Totally legit." Happily grabbing at that change of subject, I smiled big and interested.

"Good news, yeah?"

"Excellent news, bro!" He paused, leaning in close. Even though we were alone, in an empty garage, the secret lean was still somehow significant. "They're sending me on a first class mission."

"Wha-?"

"Solo."

"You serious? Dude! That's news!" He beamed. "Seriously though, whos ass are you kissin'?"

"Oh shut it. I got the email this morning. Just came from my brief, actually. I just wanted to tell you before I head out, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah, of course." I felt a knot begin to grow in my throat. Snow let me go but kept firm eye contact with me for another minute.

"Hey, Zack?" He said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Don't sweat about all that stuff from before. We're cool."

I opened and closed my mouth a few times, unsure of what to say. I didn't want him to bring it up but I guess it was a relief knowing he wasn't mad about the whole thing. I shrugged his hand off and grinned.

"Who knows? Maybe you'll get promoted to first class this time!" He smiled back but the smile faded quickly and he shook his head.

"You didn't tell the director anything, did you?" He mumbled. "About Rotsu? Or how I nearly.. cost us the mission.."

"Nah, man, we got him! That's all that matters, right?"

"Yeah.. yeah I guess." He said with a shrug. Then, as soon as it left, his excited grin returned to his face. "But this is my chance to redeem myself! Just watch, Zack. I'll make it first class!"

I watched him go, excited as he always was, and wondered if he would do well on his mission. It would be really great to see Snow first class.

But the knot in my throat only tightened at the thought and when I reached the top of the stairs, alone, I felt like I should have done something, anything, to stop him from going.

_Someone.. point me in the right direction._

__-.-.-.-.-.-.-__

It's bright again.

And again I'm paralyzed in some room, in some building, with some people somewhere out of earshot.

I can distinctly smell stale water, hot plastic, strong sanitizer and lye. I can't feel anything. I can't hear anything.

The lights shut down.

That darkness returns.

A cool, deep voice mumbles beside my ear.

"_Goodnight._"

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

The days that followed Snow's departure were slow and quiet.

Lightning and I hadn't seen or spoken to each other since the incident in Wutai eight nights ago. I wanted to call her. I needed to if only to have something distract me from this feeling of anxiety. Unfortunately I couldn't make myself do it without a legitimate reason. I didn't think she would take too kindly to it either.

Every night, after training, I was invited to join Reno in another game of Liar's Poker. An eager attempt to swindle us out of our paychecks, again. Not that he actually took what he won. He would play us until we were dry, then drop his defenses and lose it all back to us within the next hour. He was a cool guy, Reno, just lonely I think.

Every night, after poker, I would fight sleep until I couldn't anymore. I would wake up on the couch with Taki pulling on my pant leg or from falling over in the shower or from an evil wet towel slapping my face when I was caught sleeping on the bar. It wasn't until Kunsel shoved me out of his lap during a security lecture that I realized that it was stupid to torture myself like this.

_They're just dreams, Zack._

"Promise me you're not on drugs." Kunsel was saying beside of me, burning every ounce of demeanor out of my body with his eyes. I shrank away from him, laughing and shaking my head quickly.

"What? No! No way!"

"You're not acting normal."

"But I'm not on drugs!" He scrunched his eyebrows and turned back to the presentation hologram in the middle of the table. Lady was talking about precautionary measures when performing a mission of grade A confidentiality. She continued the review with safe house locations and areas of confirmed low or negative phone signal.

Kunsel sighed, leaning back in his chair and flipping his phone open to download the information into his database like some tech junkie. I put my head down on the table and envisioned the curvy, healthy embodiment of Lady's voice.

"...a new high powered frequency wave can now be utilized via the utility category installed in the official cellular phone of all Shinra SOLDIER and lower, infantry members. This frequency can be used in order to block off all outside intrusions through communication devices. However, this cannot prevent eavesdropping in any way so be sure..."

Somewhere along the way, imagining her human form became more fun than actually listening to her lecture. At times like these, I wish I had a hand at sketching rather than high risk combat.

My mind drifted someplace.. white.

The lights came back on and the last of the attending SOLDIERs left the room. I wiped the drool from my mouth with the back of my hand and sat up quickly, hoping no one else noticed me sleeping. Kunsel was still sitting beside me, watching me as I stood up slowly from my seat.

He smirked.

"How the hell did you ever make it first class?" He said, shaking his head. "It must just be your pretty face."

I laughed, dodging just as he moved to punch my chest.

"What? You mean this pretty face?" I said, cocking my head and giving him my most dazzling smile. He scoffed and wrinkled his nose.

"As if it even-"

But Kunsel was cut short when my phone rang. I pulled it from my pocket and flipped it open.

"He-llo?"

"Zack, you're needed in Modeoheim." It was the director and he sounded urgent. "Two SOLDIER operatives have already been deployed. Lightning and Villiers are both still in the field and have yet to check back in."

"Snow and.. Lightning?" I said, more to myself than to him. Was this his big mission? Was he unable to handle it on his own? I felt that knot return to my throat.

"We had to send her in after him. Regrettably we haven't heard from her either." He paused for a moment, making me anxious.

"What's out there, sir?" If Lightning and Snow couldn't handle it together, I was afraid of what it could possibly be. The director took a moment before answering me with a hardened voice.

"It's another serial. We've never seen one like this. I'll have a vehicle waiting for you in five minutes."

"Yes, sir. I'm on it."

"And Zack?"

"Sir?"

"I want you to use your full strength on this one. Give it everything you've got."

And with that, the line went dead.

Kunsel looked from the phone in my hand to me and chuckled.

"Go be a hero."

I didn't need telling twice.

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

Modeoheim was in the northernmost region of the planet, bordering the towns of lesser importance and harboring the world's most potent Mako reactor. While the people of the town were forced to leave three years ago due to the high mako concentration in the air, that only allowed for more dangerous fiends to flourish within the abandoned buildings. Not many who wandered near there fared better than they came and it was considered a death sentence to come within even twenty miles of the place. SOLDIER operatives often used it as an extreme training ground but never fared it alone, with the exceptions of Sephiroth, Genesis and sometimes, Angeal.

As we drove into it, it was hard to see anything through the harsh wind and snowfall. Rude was having a difficult time keeping the CUV steady on road, though that was partially due to the neglect this road had seen these three years. Reno was up front, helping Rude navigate using a satellite GPS all while cursing about the cold and lack of signal. Tsung, Cissnea and I road in the back, quietly, as Tsung slowly loaded and packed a group of heavy artillery weapons into a large black bag.

We continued barraging through the entrance to the town. From the window I saw the iron gate that Shinra had built three years ago standing wide open with a Shinra grade S combustible liquid dripping nearly frozen on the locks. I wanted to laugh at this, knowing Snow well enough to figure it was his idea to get in so abrasively. He was probably just in over his head, right? Called headquarters, got Lightning in response and when she pushed herself too far, they both became powerless in this climate. I bet that fiend isn't even the problem. I bet they're both doing just fine.

But when I got there it was way worse than I could have even imagined.

"Rude..." Reno mumbled, pointing out the window. "We're going to have to stop here."

We all looked where he was pointing and for a moment, no one reacted. It wasn't real. It couldn't be real. When it finally sank in, Cissnea gasped quietly to herself, her small hand covering her mouth as she did so and Tsung put down the last gun in shock. Rude stopped the car and Reno unbuckled his seat belt and threw open the door without saying another word. I followed, then Tsung, Rude and lastly Cissnea and we all stood at the edges of chaos, taking everything in at once.

"Zack." Tsung said, turning to me. "_Go find them_."

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	6. Blue

_And here I am, back without another installment to this crackship crossover._

_As always, I'd love to know what everyone think so leave me some reviews !_

_Sorry this update took so long_

_I'm in a tough spot right now._

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Broken, bloodied, mangled: hundreds of dead bodies lay scattered and piled atop one another starting from the main entrance and continuing deep into the town. Some were old; decayed, stiff and blue beyond recognition. Others were fresher, their blood staining the surrounding white though somehow blending in with their drained skin. The fresh snow covered many out of view, hiding some of the gore beneath a thick blanket and preserving their dead, pale faces in the ice.

My foot pushed off the ground and I ran. I ran through blood and bile, following the path strictly set for me between the bodies. I wanted to close my eyes. I didn't want to know. Who were these unfortunate men? Did I know any of them? Would Snow and Lightning lay among them further in? I kept running, continuing past the inn and wood shop. I jumped over a man dressed in an infantry uniform, his head and helmet removed from his shoulders and face down in the snow beside his body. I immediately thought about Cloud and forced myself to continue on without looking. I just didn't want to know.

My breath was heavy, fogging up and disappearing in front of me as I ran. The air was unnaturally quiet and there wasn't a single fiend to be found anywhere, dead or alive. The buildings were lifeless, wood decayed, doors hanging from hinges and windows broken. I noticed a man, also in an infantry uniform, pulled in half and laying on the roof of some residential cabin. I turned, sliding on some ice and skidding past a large water tower, no doubt frozen from the inside out. A few wheel barrels stood leaning against it with the sad corpse of a large dog hanging lifeless from the side.

"SNOW!" I screamed, the endless quiet finally getting the better of me. "LIGHTNING!"

The wind seemed to pick up even more at the sound of my voice. I kept calling, shouting as loud as I could over the cruel weather and continued to run through the bodies and buildings without stopping. I reached the top of the hill just above the partial reactor and slid to a stop, looking down at it with anger.

The hillside was steep with nearly two feet of snow piled onto the facing. More bodies of Shinra infantry lay scattered about in silence. I started down, heading toward the unfinished, abandoned reactor and using all my strength to push myself through the heavy snow. My boots were weighing me down. The wind lashed about my face, making my eyes tear up. Halfway down, my boot got caught on a stray limb and I fell face first into the cold.

Under normal circumstances, my lungs would be on fire. My heart would be pounding from all the running and my body would be stiff from cold. However, the Mako did so much to the human condition that I didn't feel any of this. You would then assume that I jumped up immediately, brushed myself off and kept running. Instead, I continued to lay there, staring blankly at the endless white. My mind wouldn't keep still. There was static in my ears and my throat was knotted up so painfully that I couldn't scream anymore. I closed my eyes but darkness never came. Just that endless white..

Suddenly and somewhere far into the distance, I heard a roar so loud it shook the snow dust from the trees. I rolled onto my back and listened, waiting.

"Zack?" A small voice said from somewhere above me. It was Cissnea, calling to me from the top of the hill. I was still laying among the array of corpses and when I realized this I lept to my feet. She walked down to me, taking her time and avoiding any rocks or limbs. She looked pale.

"Where are the others?" I asked. She shook her head and looked back up the hill.

"They're searching the buildings for any survivors."

"Any luck?"

"Just a dog." She said quietly. "But he was too far gone." I closed my eyes for a moment and swallowed. Cissnea continued."Reno was trying to get a reading on the fiend's location but the signal is practically non-existent down here."

"So now what?" I said with a scowl. She coiled away from me slightly and I felt immediately guilty for my irrational emotions. "Sorry."

"So..now we're to search in there." She said, nodding toward the reactor.

"That fiend isn't in there. I heard it farther out on the mountain."

"Right now, we need to find Snow and Lightning." She said, placing her hand gently on my arm as she spoke. "The fiend can wait."

"I..guess you're right." I nodded in agreement.

Every Mako reactor I'd ever been in looked identical to the last: same structures, same controls, same catwalks. The fact that this one was only half built didn't make much of a difference. Cissnea pulled the door closed tight behind us and pulled a device from her jacket. She handed me an earpiece while putting the other in her ear.

"This way we can keep in touch."

"But what about the signal?"

"These will work as long as we stay in close range. The reactor walls should contain the signal we need."

"Right."

Cissnea began pressing buttons on her small touch pad, the screen showing nothing but green numbers and coding that I couldn't even begin to decipher. I walked over to the railing instead and looked down into the glowing pool of mako. It was hot and it gave off a nice amount of heat that warmed me to the core. Cissnea's device made some clicking noises and she wandered off toward the back of the room.

I walked along the railing, looking down at the platforms below us and called out for Lightning. The shout disappeared into the high ceiling, bouncing back to me in a single metallic note. The air was dense. My ears began to ring. Walking in that building became difficult, like wading through a tide. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and headed down the flights of stairs and ladders toward the center of the reactor.

_Zack.._

A small voice, like a sub aquatic whisper in my ear. My hand jumped to the earpiece.

"H-ey! Did you say something?"

The line was filling with static as I kept walking. Cissnea's reply was a bit broken.

"No-. What's-rong-."

"N-nothing. I just though I heard something"

"B- car-ful"

"Yeah."

I was standing at the other end of the center catwalk, the ocean of brilliant green mako boiling up beneath my feet. The iron door stood closed at the other end, the window black and empty, and as I walked across the bridge I could feel a strange weight begin to press down on me.

"Snow!" I called again through the knot in my throat. It echoed from the high walls and hanging cables, almost tauntingly. I don't know why I did it. It was as if I thought he would come bursting from that door at any moment. My knees began to weaken a bit from this strange weight. I pressed on.

_Zack.._

I looked behind me, stopping at the center of the walk and listening for what seemed like an eternity. I heard it. I know I heard it that time.

"Cissnea?" I asked, the radio picking up even more static than before. The line screeched and cut off, leaving nothing but the sound of hot mako and my own breathing.

Then there was a cry so immense and painful that it echoed down to me from the upper levels of the reactor.

Taking one last glance toward that iron door I started back in the opposite direction and called into the earpiece as I ran.

"Cissnea! Hey, Cissnea!" Nothing.

I took the stairs two at a time.

Across the wide entrance, Cissnea was face down in agony, her lightning rod laying at her side, charged and spitting bolts of electricity. I looked around at the empty space, straining to find the source of her scream, to know what had hurt her. There was nothing.

"G-get out." she pleaded at me as I ran toward her. There was a large set of claw marks running from just below her cheek, down her left arm and all along her side. Her clothes were soaked in blood and she was quickly collecting a large pool around her with each passing second. I dropped my sword briefly, ripping open numerous pouches and pulling out some highly absorbent gauze to help slow the bleeding. Her face was losing color quickly and her lips were turning blue.

"Z-ack.." she mumbled, unable to move anything but her lips and eyes which were fixated on me.

"It's alright. You're gonna be alright kiddo. I'll get you back to the others and they'll fix you right up, okay? Just hold on."

_Zack.._

I shook the whispers from my head this time, concentrating only on Cissnea and dealing with the rest as it surfaced. She was losing so much blood.

_Zaaack.._

I couldn't sense it. The fiend with such large claws and quiet movements. I knew it was still here. I knew it was watching me. I was trying to pick it out of the darkness but found only more darkness in return. I grabbed another handful of gauze and pressed onto the meaty wound as hard as I could without breaking her ribs. She whimpered and shook beneath me. Where was that fiend?

A sudden intake of breath somewhere behind me, a low growl and the sound of strong muscles flexing.

"ZACK!"

And there it was.

But I didn't move fast enough and before I could draw my weapon four massive claws caught me from behind, tearing at my skin with one silent strike. I cried out once, turning immediately to face my attacker. But it was gone again.

I picked up my sword and positioned myself in a defensive stance, waiting. I heard Cissnea let out a small sigh as her head lowered onto the floor. Passed out.

As if it were laughing at me, the creature let out a loud howl, not unlike a dog's, but the sound jumped from the walls of the reactor and I was unable to pinpoint where it came from. It just echoed over and over again. It laughed and laughed and laughed.

Next time it came from my peripheral vision, claws extended and it's large muzzle baring teeth the size of my head. I whipped around, prepared to face it this time, and manged to wedge my sword vertically between its' jaws. We fought against one another now, brute strength against brute strength until the wolf-like fiend snapped its bite down on my right arm, shoving my sword through its upper jaw. It cried out then, but the hold it had on my arm with those giant fangs was enough to cripple me as well and for a few seconds we both remained unmoving, in agony.

I reached for Cissnea's weapon, the movement causing that fang to penetrate deeper, tearing more flesh as it went. My fingertips pulled it closer, into my grasp, and with one sudden stab behind its ear, I forced a wave of electricity through it's skull that circled around and entered my body as well. This staggered the both of us and the fiend only seemed to bite down with even more force; its body jerking slightly with muscle spasms.

And from here we reached a stalemate, the wolf's yellow eyes unyielding even with the loss of so much blood and obvious pain. My right arm trapped within its' jaws, fang nearly biting my arm in two, with my fist clenched tightly around the helm of my equally trapped sword. I was aware of my dying friend only a few feet beside me. I could feel myself weakening as the loss of blood took its toll. I began weighing the possibilities of outlasting the creature. The outcome seemed without my favor.

Then a shot rang out somewhere to my left and before I could even blink, eight Grade A SOLDIER bullets lodged themselves within the brain of the massive wolf. Before it could even cry out, it fell dead at my feet, jaw loosening just enough to free my arm of its' bite. My arm began to bleed even more and I looked around frantically for my rescuer.

It could only be one person.

I looked up toward the hanging catwalks to see Lightning curled up, her left arm dangling, the bones in her legs shattered and multiple claw marks along her chest and face making her almost unrecognizable. I cried out to her, but she leaned her head against the railing, closing her eyes and nodding at my feet. Nodding toward Cissnea, the human woman whose body was not artificially designed to heal itself rapidly, like ours.

Suddenly remembering the urgency of this moment, I quickly went back to work on my friend, ignoring the massive amount of pain along my back and upper arm. There didn't seem to be enough gauze. She was losing so much blood, I couldn't even see the wound properly. My limbs began weighing much more than before and my blood only added to the ever growing pool at our feet.

"Come on! Come ON! Don't DIE on me!"

I heard the automobile roaring to a halt outside and knew instantly that my job was done. The door burst open and the rest of the Turks filed in quickly, taking hardly no time to assess the situation before running to my side and taking over the task of dressing Cissnea's injuries. Tseng nodded in my direction before Rude carried her out into the CUV without any orders to do so. I sat motionless in our blood, my hands and arms glistening in the red liquid.

After that, I remember my head becoming heavy, like it had in the furthest reaches of the reactor. Reno placed his hand on my uninjured shoulder and squeezed a little, saying something about Cissnea. Telling me she would be okay now. Telling me not to worry. My body became more of a burden to hold upright and the nauseous feeling set in like a flame. I closed my eyes, feeling myself hit the floor without resistance.

Then, everything went white again.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_To be continued in the next chapter._


	7. Right Where it Belongs

_This new addition is a very short one and I apologize for that  
><em>

_It's a small break from the blood and swordplay, but only just_

_As always, **don't forget to review** and keep checking back for the latest installment_

_- Resplendnce  
><em>

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_Cold steel _  
><em>Blood <em>  
><em>Burnt leather<em>

The fog slowly lifts from my head and I can instantly smell the danger in my surroundings. I'm so terrified of opening my eyes that I allow myself to lay there, seemingly still unconscious, and take a moment to sift through my mind. To remember- who am I? Where am I? What is my mission and who am I trying to save?

My name is Zack Fair. I am SOLDIER, 1st Class. My best friend is Snow Villiers. Snow is missing. We were attacked by a serial. Lightning saved me. She's badly injured. Cissnea is dying.

I can feel a sharp pain starting from my chest and working its way through my body until it reaches the very tips of my fingers. I feel heavy, my flesh stinging with a strange type of coldness and the act of merely flexing my hand becomes painful. Cissnea is dying. Cissnea is dying because I wasn't there. Why wasn't I there?

I remember the blood pool; Cissnea's wound growing by the second. There's a voice calling my name. There's a massive set of fangs tearing my arm from my body. Lightning in a crumpled, broken heap, leaning on the supports. Then there's Rude carrying that small girl like an oversize marionette, away from my clumsy hands. Beyond my vision. There's voices and screaming and somewhere far away, a sigh. My mind is a broken record, replaying the same scenes again and again and again.

My name is Zack Fair. I am SOLDIER, 1st Class. I live in an apartment complex near the south side of Sector 5. I have a dog named Taki. My best friend is Snow Villiers. Snow Villiers is missing. Snow Villiers might already be dead.

I force my eyes open, so that a new set of morbid images cannot force their way into my mind. It takes another moment for my brain to register that, even though my eyes are open, the darkness seemingly goes on forever.

There's a muffled sound, like fabric against fabric. Someone is breathing deeply as they would in sleep. I don't move, matching their pace with my own breath.

_Pomegranate._  
><em>Mint leaves.<em>  
><em>Warm skin.<em>

With a tentative hand I reach out into the open space above me, touching nothing. I inhale deeply, forcing through the steel, leather and blood to find those sweet scents once again. I don't have to guess who or where because I know she's somewhere to my left. I'm too afraid to find her with my cold hands.

A new kind of fatigue takes over my mind from the exertion of merely lifting my arm.

"I know you're awake."

Her voice scares me and for a minute I'm unable to respond. There's some small shuffling sounds before a cold hand finds my left arm in the darkness and fingertips brush over my skin, almost like she's afraid. When I finally do speak my voice is hoarse and my throat, dry.

"I'm glad you're okay." She laughs bitterly, the scowl clearly registering in her voice.

"You just wait till morning, Fair."

For a brief moment, Lightning and I lay in silence and after some hesitation, she finds my hand with hers. I close my eyes again, giving up on seeing through this darkness.

Suddenly I realized that I'm not in any pain.

"Do you know how long we've been out?" I ask quietly, making a list of questions and starting with the easiest ones. Lightning answers them without hesitation, but as she speaks her hand slips away from mine. Our moment of pleasant company over.

After I passed out Lightning, Cissnea and I were rushed back to Midgar for medical attention. Cissnea had lost so much blood that she went into hypovolemic shock as soon as we entered the building and was taken to another room for aggressive treatment. Lightning tells me that due to the high mako concentration in Modeoheim, the native fiends are unnaturally stronger than normal fiends. The fiend in the reactor wasn't a serial like I had thought, but a hybrid bred from a native fiend in that area and a specially selected serial.

There's no new information on Snow's whereabouts or if he's still alive, but after the data gathered in Modeoheim they've confirmed that whatever killed all those people in the town was not the fiend we faced.

She says that my wounds were minimal at best and were easily treated upon arrival. I have, however, been asleep for four days.

"And what about you?" I ask after a few more minutes of silence. I hear some shuffling and a sigh.

"Well, there won't be any collateral damage if that's what you mean."

"No, I mean how are you now?"

"I'm fine."

I'm used to Lightning's coldness. It's just a part of who she is -a shield she carries to defend herself- but the way she sounded, as if she was choking on her own words, made me think twice about letting it go.

"I'm tired. You should sleep too."

I say okay and turn my back to her, knowing full well she can't see me. But I can't sleep. Not after hearing all of that and especially not after learning I've already been out for four days. I thought of Snow, wondering if he's breathed his last breath in the time it took for me to recover from a random fiend attack. Whatever killed all those men is still out there and I may never find my best friend.

The idea of leaving this room passes through my mind once or twice but the task of navigating through this advanced darkness turns me away from it and I continue to lay in my bed, cradled into some sort of fetal position. I wished Lightning would touch me again. I longed for her body pressed against mine. She isn't telling me everything I need to know, I know that, but it's obviously for my own protection. Or hers.

Eventually the morning does come. Eventually the lights come on, the nurses file in and I am laying on my back, staring up at a familiar, endless expanse of white.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	8. Song of the Caged Bird

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It takes all of two seconds for the familiarity of this room to register and I'm helpless to stop myself from jerking upright in a near panic. There are three nurses, two of which are large men with strong physics, and with my offensive action they're quick to rush towards me.

I spring from the cot and find myself tangled among medical equipment stands and chords. I manage to jerk free and dodge them, nearly knocking over a trash can as I run. I can see my path out until the two have me tackled onto the ground just inches from the door. I reach out, my right hand clawing at the frame while I wrestle my left arm free, bringing my elbow down hard into someone's skull. I hear the man let out a grunt but he doesn't relent and the brightness of the room nearly blinds me into submission.

And for a moment, I question the legitimacy of my panic. I want to ask myself why I'm overreacting like this. Why am I'm fighting the nurses that worked so hard to heal me? I see a pair of dainty white shoes before the one on my left grabs a handful of my hair and jerks my head to the side, revealing my neck. The third nurse, I now see, is a young girl no older than fifteen with a thin frame and white hair pulled into a bun at her nape. She kneels down to our level, looking at me with a blank expression before holding up the largest needle I've ever seen. Maybe it only appeared larger because it was in her hands. Maybe it only seemed threatening because of how she was looking at me.

Either way, I stopped questioning my right to rebel.

"No!" That's the only thing I manage to scream before I feel the thing stick into my neck with a sharp pinch. The brightness is quickly dimming and all I can seem to think about is the thick snow coating the northern mountaintops and the smell of large pines stretching on for miles above me.

The next time I come to I'm looking up at the ceiling again only this time everything's a soggy grey color, there's an air duct to the right and I can see something bright red in my peripheral view. I roll my head to the side just as Reno peels back the skin of an orange, digging his thumb into the fleshy inside and pulling a piece free just to pop it in his mouth. The juice dribbles down his chin.

"Yo." He said with a wave. "How ya feelin'?"

And for reasons I cant even begin to explain, even to myself, I almost feel angry towards him. His familiar smirking face just irritates me. His laid back posture and untucked dress shirt set my jaw into a firm clench. Even the way he's tearing into that orange like a child turns my gaze back on the ceiling.

"Well.. to be honest man, I've been better." I said with a scowl. I'm not sure if he can sense my irritation and I'm not sure that I want him to. "What's with that sedative, huh? I can still feel where they stuck me."

He chuckles.

"Well, in their defense, you are a highly lethal 1st Class SOLDIER. Most likely suffering from PTSD, hyper vigilance and a number of other stupid, doctor diagnosed, psychological problems."

I imagine those tall pines again, feeling the freezing snow beneath me as if I could almost grab it up in handfuls. I imagine those trees and allow myself a moment more of quiet. I slow my breathing. I sort my words into short sentences and take care not to say anything I might regret later. But mostly I just keep on imagining those trees.

"Just a bit of deja vu actually."

"Right." He laughed, taking another sloppy bite of his orange. "How's your shoulder?"

"I haven't really gotten a good look at me yet."

"You don't look too bad."

"Thanks man, you're not too bad yourself."

Reno tosses the empty shell into the bin beside my bed and chuckles some more, shaking his head. My irritation with him is starting to subside but I still just want to lay in this abstract bed of snow.

_Snow._

And I ask myself when exactly it was that I started losing my grip on reality.

"You're quiet." Reno says. His words are like a set of hands pulling me up from an icy lake.

"I guess I have a lot on my mind." He takes that into consideration for a moment. The room settles into a fragile state of tension; neither of us willing to speak for fear of breaking it. He gets up, crosses the room to a small sink and washes the sticky orange juice from his hands. He comes back with a towel and seems to make a five minute task of merely drying his hands. When he does finally look up, his voice is very quiet-serious. It reminds me of the reality that he is a Turk and I am just a highly trained blood hound.

"Cissnea woke up last night. She can't speak. Something happened to her vocal chords. She can't remember much of the accident either, what we managed to get from her on paper. But she's alive."

We're making eye contact again and with my attention in his grasp he continues.

"They'll fix her voice. Tsung will see to that-"

"Any news on Snow?"

"Nothing new."

"Who's out there?" He furrows his brow, confused. "Who's _looking_ for him right now?"

"After we left Modeohiem with you three, Tsung stayed behind with some equipment. He thinks he can pick up on the fiend's location. Elena and a handful of 2nd class guys are there now. "

"That stuff won't work. The signal is-"

"I know, I know. But he won't listen to reason. He's Tsung."

"I didn't think he even liked Snow.."

"Don't be an idiot. He's not doing it for Snow. Or for you."

I felt myself suppressing the urge to punch random objects. What was going on out there?

"What about Lightning?"

"She's fine Zack."I sat up, highly regretting doing so afterwards because suddenly my head began to pound.

"She was in the room with me, earlier." I remembered the bright white room. I remembered the panic, the feeling of absolution -the urgency. I couldn't remember Lightning at all.

"Did she see them.. sedate me?" Reno was searching my face for something before he spoke.

"No, Zack."

"Can I.. can I _see_ her?"

"Come on, lay back down." I got the feeling he was searching my face, trying to decide just how to lie to me.

"Reno."

"They're keepin' an eye on you man. Don't want you runnin' off down the hall half naked and screaming about Armageddon."

I didn't have a response for that one but I forced him to keep eye contact with me while I debated whether or not to trust him. Reno was the only friend I had right now but he was also a Turk. He was trained in deception.

"So what's next?" I say with a sigh, leaning back on the hospital pillows.

"Next we get you out of those." He nodded at my bandages. "Then we get you down to PT and see if you're fit enough to walk out of here a healed man."

"Alright. How soon do we go back?"

"Back?"

"To Modeohiem." Reno gave me a hard stare, mostly one of confusion yet I could see traces of panic in his gaze. He gave a weak chuckle and patted my shoulder.

"Listen man.."

"That's why you're here anyways, right? To give a report? Well look, I'm fine. I'm ready to get back out there. Don't make me pack up and go home now."

"I know you're fine, Zack, but after what happened in the reactor..and with the nurses..the director thinks you should sit this one out."

"_Then change his mind_!"

"Look, I don't have that kind of authority here!"

"Why are you here then?" I could feel my voice rising. Reno shrank back in his chair. "Why did they send _you_ and not someone else to tell me I'm off the mission?"

"Well.. I guess they thought you'd like a familiar face when you came 'round this time."

"And that's supposed to keep me from going all crazy, _right_?" I closed my eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "Do not sit there and tell me I'm not going back. I am going back. For Snow."

"And what happens when you find him, huh? What happens when you find him, and that beast and the bloodshed is too much for you to handle? What if he's dead, Zack, and you can't move your arms fast enough to even keep yourself alive? Then what are you? A _dead_ SOLDIER. You shouldn't be out there. I don't care how good and fine you are."

"_He's not dead_."

"Yeah, well what if he is?"

"I'm going."

And here is where we reach our stalemate. Here is where hard decisions make themselves. Reno's eyes were something of an intimidating feature but that didn't change anything about his size. As I keep reminding myself today, he's a Turk. But I am SOLDIER. I am 1st Class.

I could kick his ass up and down this hospital if I had to.

"You're gonna fight me then?"

"One way or another, I'm getting back on that mountain."

"Well then.." He said as he stood from his chair, sighing. I watched him lean behind my bed, pressing a small silver button, alerting the nurses down the hall. At first I thought he was giving up on me, calling them in so they could put me under for an indefinite amount of time this round. I moved defensively, planning the perfect moment to jump from this bed and render him unconscious. But he sat back down, giving me his trademark grin and nodding in my direction.

"It's not gonna be easy you know."

"So.. you'll help me?"

"I figure its the least I can do after last week's poker annihilation."

"Well.. whatever helps you sleep at night." I was smiling now, which felt almost foreign to me by this point. Reno chuckled a little in response but his expression didn't quite match it. He seemed worn down- tired. I guess for him to help me would be a direct defiance of orders, but I couldn't pretend I didn't know what I was asking from the start.

"Thanks, man."

"Let's just get you fixed up SOLDIER."

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

_To be continued in the next chapter .._


	9. Skinny Love pt 1

_A piece that needed some serious revision. _  
><em>The nextnew chapter will be up by the end of the week._  
><em>Promise.<em>

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

Less than twelves hours later and I'm back in Modeohiem. I'm back among the bodies and bloodstained buildings. The snow is still as cold and the winds are still as cruel as ever. I feel lost. I feel determined. I feel like I can't move my legs fast enough to achieve anything at all.

Reno left me at the gate, splitting off to find the rest of his team while I take to higher ground, away from the eyes of Shinra. It isn't long before I've made it to the top of the hillside overlooking the town and at the wide mouth of a darkening forest. I reached a gloved hand toward a strong trunk and gripped it turning around one last time. Somehow viewing everything from this distance made it that much worse to behold. All those lives lost in the deep valley of snow; most of the carnage had been long buried by now.

I decided it was best to forget about them now. My primary objective was to find my friend and get us both home in one piece. The forest suddenly seemed to grow increasingly vast in front of my eyes.

They are just as I remember them in strength and in majesty. Their tall trunks stretch on for miles in every direction, humbling me and hushing my breath. I keep trudging forward as the light from the outside becomes far away and every uphill step brings me farther into the depths, father up the mountain than I'd ever thought to climb. From here the woods gather closely with fewer spaces between the trunks and a very shallow bed of snow begins thinning out at my feet, revealing stone and dark earth. I can start to see the tops of dead grasses and feel the life within the trees around me. I listen for some sign of what I know is within these pines.

I listen hard for three days.

I trudged on through this endless terrain, hearing nothing but distant winds or the occasional snow fox hunting for hibernating prey. The high altitude and lack of even the thinnest sunlight makes the temperature drop drastically. I'm deeper into these trees than I'd ever intended and now there is no light to be seen in any direction. Cold, blind and frustrated, I start stumbling over logs and rocks, no longer being careful or quiet. If there was a fiend in these pines surely it would have launched itself at me by now?

The darkness makes it hard to tell from day and night anymore but I know it has to be dark outside these trees when my boot catches on a branch. The dead weight of my limbs pulls me down a small bank and into a bed of pine needles; my head falls backwards into a hard wall of stone. I cry out, angry and hurt. My legs sprawl uphill as my head screams with pain. I know I'm bleeding; I can feel the freshly open flesh sting against the cold - against the hard rock and pine. When my eyes begin to water in the darkness I tell myself it's because of the impact, because of the cold or maybe because I haven't eaten for days. But when they continue to water after a few minutes, and I feel the hot liquid trickling by my ear, I know better than to lie to myself in this frozen piece of hell.

"Snow!" I scream out, crying. Begging. "Snooow!"

And I hear it echo. It calls back to me through the trees and well into the darkness behind me, bouncing from stone wall to stone wall until it vanishes somewhere deep within. I'm coughing and crying and screaming his name, unable to sit up or take cover from the cold. The wind howls outside the canopy of trees. There's a muffled shuffling somewhere in the distance. I close my eyes to the darkness.

"I am Zack Fair. SOLDIER, 1st Class."

I know my head is still bleeding. My cheek is laying in a pool of it now.

"I am SOLDIER, 1st Class."

My body becomes light. My stomach is sick.

"I am SOLIDER.."

_Is it because of the blood loss or because I'm starving?_

"SOLDIER..."

And I black out.

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_To be continued in the next chapter.._


	10. Skinny Love pt 2

_Thanks for sticking with me guys._

_Please review?_

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"You know something?"

The voice seems muffled, pulling me from a deep fog and forcing my mind to be awake and alert. There's fire. I know there's fire because I can feel it on my skin - smell the wood - hear the cracking. My body is sore and there's an intense pressure behind my eye like I've never imagined, forcing me to keep them both closed. Still motionless; Still asleep.

"I think.. I think I knew you'd be out there..searching."

I tell myself I'm imagining this voice. I'm dreaming her. I know I am. I'd hit my head. I was concuss.

"You were screaming for him..and crying."

I tell my arm to move, to feel if the wound behind my head has healed yet, but for some reason my brain isn't sending out the signals needed to accomplish such a simple action.

"If it was me though.. would you have been so determined?"

I want to open my eyes. I need to see her. I need to know if she's real..

"I tell myself you would. You've never let me down before, right?"

She laughs bitterly and irritation takes hold in her tone.

"I don't know why I'm even bothering.. You're too good to be true, you know that? I bet you're full of hot air and..shit."

There's a sigh. A quiet shift of clothing.

"I should go get food. You'll be starving when you come to.."

My head throbs but I can feel my body regaining some strength.

"And then.. Dammit I'll have to tell you the truth. About me..and Snow. Shinra..and the Serials too.."

I open my eyes just wide enough to see her boots, drying beside the fire.

"And then what? You'll leave, right? Course you will.. Anyone else would do exactly the same."

Another sigh.

"I bet you smile like that at everyone, huh?"

Irritation.

"Yeah..well..! I don't need your help and I don't need your stupid smiling face and I don't..want to..!"

There's a loud crashing as she screams out in frustration. Not really sure what it was she just threw, or kicked, but I'm sure it was something heavy and probably inoperable now. The cave echoes loudly and continues to repeat the sound back to us even after she's settled back down. She sits by my head and sighs. After a few more seconds of silence, she hesitantly runs a hand through my hair, carefully avoiding the wound. Some of the pressure behind my eye subsides and I can't help but smile a little in relief.

"Okay.. so maybe I do need you."

Her voice gives way to something new..

"What then?"

_Pain.._

"I can't watch you die too.."

Her hand runs over my ear and along my neck. The feeling of her fingers, lingering.. They burn my skin.

"Zack.."

And this new kind of weakness erupted within me, catching my breath as if I'd been knocked to the ground with full force. It made me shiver. It gave me strength. She repeated it several times, playing with the word- giving it new meaning. She whispered it. She sighed it. It was a question. It was a plea. I couldn't pretend anymore. It was all I could do to lay still as she leaned over my motionless frame/ Her hair fell across my cheek, and our noses brushed in the most electrifying way. I was holding my breath, waiting.

And she kissed me so softly I almost didn't believe it was real.

I parted my lips a bit wider and rose up with her, cautiously. She pulled back at first, a heavy sigh on her lips; her breasts rising and falling with her breathing. We were a few inches apart and our eyes were locked onto one another for a long moment, at a standstill. I could see her thinking, deciding on what to do now. Getting defensive was surely the first thing on her mind but she'd just been caught and couldn't possibly deny it now.

One wrong move and this moment would be gone, forever. One word out of place would break her. So for a long moment we were frozen, noses just barely touching and breath hot on our lips; silence hanging in the air. It wasn't until I brought my hand to her face and brushed her cheek with my fingertips that either of us moved. She closed her eyes, leaned into my hand and inhaled slowly.

I pulled her back to me, softly urging her lips to part as I sat up. We pulled away once, twice, taking each other in. I brushed her hair from her face on more than one occasion; her bangs seemed determined to shield her eyes from mine. With each kiss she seemed to burn, her cheeks, her ears, her hands and neck. We shuffled about the small stone room at an incredibly clumsy pace until I'd somehow found my back to the wall, her hand pressing hard on my chest. She traced my lips with her tongue and I felt something inside me rise up and echo in my throat in very quiet moan. Her breathing was steady and completely in sync with mine; it was as if she thought she could hide behind the sound of my own. She climbed in my lap, her knees gripping my thighs on both sides, and took my face in her hands for another long kiss.

The fire. The fire seemed so hot now I was starting to feel light headed. A small bead of sweat trickled down Lightning's neck and chest, hiding in that dip where her breasts met. It drew my attention like a moth to a flame. I wanted to reach for them, unzip that hot leather vest and hold them in both of my hands. I wanted to play with the soft pink buds until she begged me to stop, or for more. But it seemed too sudden. It wasn't right and I knew that would have to wait some other time.

But I was content with just kissing her. The way her hands pulled me closer and her hips swayed lightly. I loved my fingers in her hair. I loved her scent. I loved her tongue between my lips, teasing me so that I'd have to beg her to do it again. But most of all I loved the way she would slip up every so often and let out a sigh of satisfaction I'd never heard before, each one something special in and of itself.

It seemed like she tried to speak, once, but her words were quickly mumbles which turned back into breathing

It seemed like we could go on like this forever but eventually the fire began to die without tinder and we grew so exhausted that it became a chore just to breathe. We sat, not speaking, with our foreheads pressed against each other until the cave was left dim, lit only by a few dying cinders.

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_To be continued in the next chapter.._


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